By Bart Games
Hot on the heels of Hasbro’s modernisation of Cluedo, Milton Bradley has decided to modernise a beloved classic of their own as ‘Guess Who?’ gets a 21st century makeover. Instead of a random selection of rag-tag individual cartoon persons, MB plans to utilise only the images of people on the FBI’s most wanted terrorists list.
“I guess we just needed to move with the times. Nowadays people need to be able to identify criminals and terrorists more than they need to be able to recognise your average man or woman on the street.” Said Jakarta Undertale, an official spokesperson for MB.
“We have designed the game to fit in with a suitably horrible and overly violent presentation of life, like news does.” He continued.
The modernisation of board games is nothing new. ‘Monopoly’ has introduced a card-based version whereby players do not require the old Monopoly Money. ‘Cluedo’ has recently ousted sexist anachronism Mrs. White and filled her position with a sassy scientist Dr. Orchid. ‘The Game of Life’ changed its name to ‘The Game of Seemingly Endless Suffering, Growing Into A Spiral of Work and Debt Until an Inevitable Decline Into an Undignified Death’ and of course jigsaw puzzles famously now complete themselves for the lazy iPhone generation.
“We feel we can be both informative and fun with this new venture.” Jakarta continued to say, despite not having been asked and somewhat harassing us as we tried to leave via our car in the car park. “You never know, the next generation of Guess Who? Players could be the next generation of FBI agents, NSA snoopers or politicians sanctioning mass surveillance on the populace despite the illegality of the measure. Truly we can make the world a better place.”
Terminal Context is aware of the shoddy quality of the lead image, including the tiny terrorist seemingly planted in the middle of nowehere. However, we found it quite funny so left it there.