David Cameron to Resign as Prime Minister by October

By Gordon Handshake

When his Department for Work and Pensions were being investigated by the United Nations for potential untoward activity in the areas of welfare, leading to people who were dying being declared fit for work, pressures being placed on the jobless far and above a reasonable level of stress, increased use of food banks by working families, an increase in the numbers of the working poor and the covering up of around 8,000 deaths directly linked with these policies – David Cameron stood tall.

As his chancellor borrowed and borrowed, whilst talking about how borrowing is what labour would do, and then borrowed even more. Even though he borrowed more than the entirety of the prior labour government in just 4 years, even though the Great British public kind of lost faith with this man’s chancellor – David Cameron stood tall.

Even when the entire country was making jokes about how he fucked a pig – David Cameron stood tall.

Now, because he failed to win a referendum vote where his sole platform seemed to be to tell people we would all spontaneously combust the morning of June 24th if we voted out, and being met with the sort of pig-headed defiance that should be expected of the same people who stupidly voted conservative as the ‘party of the working people’ as if they ever have been – David Cameron resigns.

The man has announced that he is to step down by October, although details are as yet scant. Will there be a general election, as there rightfully should be? Or will this be a power hand-off akin to Tony Blair and Gordon Brown, an undemocratic shifting of the sands? We shall see, but we at Terminal Context can’t say we aren’t glad to see the back of a man who did his best to dupe a nation up to the point it really mattered.


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