Intern Timmy’s Poems – The Great Lallana Llama Drama

by Timmy the Intern
The Great Lallana Llama Drama

Whether banker or a farmer,
from the pauper to Obama,
doesn’t matter – dull or charmer,
you will spit out your banana
when you hear the truth about the
Great Lallana Llama Drama

Lallana he played football,
he was quite alright.
But he ruined it all
by buying, in the night,
a llama with a headband
a real action star,
In aviator Ray Bans
and with an awesome car.
The llama drove to Chester
whilst smuggling a moose.
All people were impressed-a
but then the wheels came loose.
The llama started speeding,
the tyres screeched and popped
but his speed kept increasing
and he just couldn’t stop.
So police gave chase in pandas
with sirens all a-wail.
The llama nicked a lunar lander
and checked other people’s mail.
The llama now was troubled
and desperate to escape
so he locked on to Hubble
and launched himself to space.

Now he’s a space llama
Cheshire Police giving chase
The llama looks down laughing
at the whole human race.

And that is how the story goes
on the run like Osama
chased by the state in a tale so great
it’s the Great Lallana Llama Drama.


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